It would be nice to be in your arms right now <3

I’ve read your blog for the past half hour and I am completely awaken more like motivated lol It’s been a long time since I’ve read an inspiring blog as yours. Hopefully I’ll be able to feel an insight of what you experienced. Must read more later (:

shella, stop looking back and feeling guilty for yourself. He’s telling you that you’re immature and don’t understand the world when his condition can be fixed by something or someone else and not from you. What’s the point of me doing that for you when I have him? Telling me to bend the rules and be open to you while I have him? This is pathetic, I worry too much. I no longer have feelings of loving you back or ever going back to you but I worry because I left this situation untouched. I couldn’t do anything to help you because I’m not the right person to go to this time. Despite everything you’ve tried convincing me to do, I still have hope for you. Deep inside you aren’t a bad guy, I’ve seen the perks in you and how much of a gentleman you once were towards me and I absolutely loved it. It’s all past but I know someday, someone is going to love all of you and accept you as you. I don’t know who that next girl will be but I’m hoping she has the same ideal thoughts as you do. Our attitudes together aren’t compatible and we always quarrel and it’s because we have different needs. 

I’m sorry but you looked fucking better with your hair hazel brown. I seriously don’t get what is freakin attractive about red hair. I believe that your red hair is only calling for people to compliment you and say good things about you when you’re already beautiful with your brown or black hair. Maybe you’ve felt tired for having brown hair for too long and that you’ve decided to dye it back. You really don’t see how gorgeous you are without the whole color dye in the first place. It’s not that I don’t like you or hate you for the things you’ve done to yourself and to yeobo but if you actually changed for the better, chances are I could have given you a shot to enter my life. Maybe one day we could have a counseling day and talk out everything. I’m not sure if that’s possibly something you would want, though I have no idea what type of person you actually are since I’ve never been friends with you. Although it’s something I would have done. I feel like if you’re going to continue to hunt down my yeobo and making him feel that he shouldn’t have left you then my gut feeling is going to make me find you. He really did want to be friends with you at some point in the future if you somehow changed for the better inside and truthfully I’m completely okay with it. I don’t want you shoving and pushing him around as you did before. Say something true, say something that you aren’t afraid to say but be honest with him. If you have problems, go to your friends, go to your boyfriend and if my yeobo is your last resort then there has to be a good reason for it. I guarantee you that he will not solve your problems but I know he has a heart to help you. Lately he’s been trying to get away from you because he see’s that he’ll go through the same problems the more he gets involved with you. You should be thankful at least that if no one else is there to catch you, I’m damn sure he’ll run out there and save you and if you don’t appreciate that but abuse it then I don’t see that there’s a point for him to continue trying. I know deep inside I would have down the same for Jeremy, if all he needed was a supportive shoulder, someone to listen to, someone to save him from whatever stupid thing he’s doing. I would run out there myself if no one else was willing to because he’s still my bestfriend. 

And I hope I can reach to your expectations.